In Chinese society, people are typically born within a network of personal relationships. Rather than adhering to formal rules, which are seen as applying to outsiders, Chinese people prefer to operate through unwritten understandings among their social connections.
In contrast, Western societies emphasize universal and equitable rules as the bedrock of social order. There's no need to navigate complex social relationships – simply following the established rules suffices, regardless of who you're dealing with.
China has demonstrated its capacity to adapt to modern rule-based systems, as evidenced by its decades of economic development in alignment with international norms.
However, things have shifted recently due to growing overconfidence among many Chinese. It is particularly evident in the current Chinese government under Xi's leadership, which has developed an inflated sense of China's importance, believing the world cannot function without them. They've started to dismiss systems and values they once respected.
What fuels this overconfidence? It stems largely from China's role as the world's manufacturing hub. In areas where they've achieved technological competence through adaptation and refinement, they believe they can challenge existing international norms. They demand a seat at the table in shaping future international rules and insist on being treated with deference. Essentially, they're trying to apply the principles of relationship-based governance to international relations. They view their disregard for established rules, and even their creation of new ones, as a privilege earned through their economic and industrial might.
However, international rules aren't created in a vacuum – they're the product of long-term interaction between nations, deeply rooted in historical, cultural, and political realities. While the international community can be accommodating on minor issues during peaceful times, any attempt to fundamentally challenge or upend the existing world order inevitably faces pushback. This fundamental disconnect explains the growing tension and confrontation between China and the Western world.
中国人在绝大多数情况下，生于熟人社会，死于熟人社会。他们倾向于在熟人关系中建立默契，而不太愿意尊重所谓的规则，因为规则是对外人的，不是对熟人的。
而西方人则更注重规则的普遍性和公平性，认为规则是维系社会秩序的基础。无论有没有熟人，按照规则办事即可，不必折腾应酬搞熟人社会的那一套。
其实中国也有能力融入现代规则。中国过去的几十年在经济上的发展，就是遵循了通行的国际规则。
而今发生了变化是因为有很多中国人开始自大了，他们认为原先非常重视看重，高看的一些东西，没有什么特殊的。尤其是当下的中国政府，在习的带领下，产生了一种幻觉，认为这个世界离开中国就得停摆，必须要正视中国。
这种过分的自信是基于什么呢？基于中国目前能够给整个世界提供的工业品。他们认为在所有他们可以二次创新的领域中，他们具备挑战现行国际规则的能力。他们要求在制定未来的国际规则的过程中，一定要有他们参与，并且他们需要得到尊重。他们试图将熟人社会中的经验套用到国际关系中。他们把无视规则，甚至可以随意创造规则当作一种任性，而且是非常有底气，基于实力的任性。
国际规则是各国在长期互动中逐步形成的共识，其背后蕴含着深厚的历史、文化和政治因素。在和平环境中，在不触及到原则性问题的时候，国际社会往往会表现出包容态度。而一旦试图挑战甚至颠覆现有的国际秩序，必然会遭到国际社会的抵制。这也是目前中国和整个西方社会出现分歧，走入对抗的根本原因。